It's Not About The House

This is really long, but it's a story I've been wanting to tell for a couple of months now.

Since we have been attending at Southwest, one of the really important lessons that has taken hold in my heart is that Christianity, evangelism, etc. is about relationships. It’s about getting connected to people, in all their goodness and muck, and being Christ to them. One of the ways that this concept has been put into practice is through a group of men that gets together with our preacher in his basement. The “basement boys” are all about confessing sin and victory, holding each other accountable, and just being in relationship with each other for the purpose of becoming more like Christ. The more I heard about this group, the more I wanted to be in a group like it. So, starting in about January, I really began to mull over the idea of beginning a group like the “basement boys”.

Around the end of May, my husband came across a house that we thought was pretty amazing. We had been discussing the idea of moving for a couple of years, but weren’t in any great hurry. In our discussions, we had come up with a pretty specific list of things we wanted in a house, one that I thought was probably pretty lofty for a good long time. But then we happened along this house on Gary St.

Of course, this brought our discussions about selling our house and buying another one right to the forefront of our minds. When we got home from our ranch trips, I decided to find a realtor and just see if this house was as great as we thought it was or if there were others out there. At the time, it seemed like it fit all of the things we wanted and so I wondered if it was truly unique.

I discovered pretty quickly that the Gary house was NOT unique. There were actually quite a few houses out there that came pretty close to fitting most of the things that we wanted. After about a week of looking at what felt like a million houses, I found one that seemed like the perfect fit for our wish list. It had room for both of us to have an office, plus a guest room, and it had a fantastic shop. But what I really loved about it was the living space. It had a large living room that was open to the dining room and also open to a den that was added on to the original house. When I stood in the kitchen and looked out into those rooms, I began to envision life group, scrapbooking, and maybe even a space for my own version of the “basement boys”. The flicker of longing to begin a group was being fanned into a small but steady flame.

On one of those house searching days, I stopped by N’s office just to chat and got a phone call from our realtor while I was there. The price on the house I liked had been reduced by ten thousand dollars and she wondered if I wanted to show it to N. Of course I did, so we made an appointment to meet there. My second visit to the house was even better than the first. All I could think about was how great of a house it would be for entertaining and how perfect for starting “the group”. N loved the house too; the flame grew.

Unfortunately, we were not in a place to make an offer on this wonderful house. Our house wasn’t even on the market, and we sure couldn’t have two houses. So, after much discussion, we decided to get ours ready, put it on the market, and then make an offer.

In the mean time, we went back to our dream house for one more look. This time, when I walked in the house, I immediately told God that if He gave us this house or one like it, I would give it back to Him. I told Him I’d have ladies in, get in relationship, and really allow Him to work through those relationships to transform me.

We spent about ten days packing up all the excess in our current house and moving it out to storage. Then I cleaned, repaired, painted, and staged our house so that it was show ready. Our realtor was thrilled because we were willing to do most anything she suggested. Our thinking was that we wanted to do everything we could to get it sold, and if that meant living in Whoville for a while, we were willing.

From the first day it listed, we had lots of lookers. And I began to imagine what it would be like to have the house we wanted. In under a week, God sent a buyer, and we had a full price contract on our house to close in just weeks. We turned around and negotiated a contract on the dream house the next day. And though I was very excited, I couldn’t help but remember the promise I’d made to God and be just a little nervous about what I’d done.

But that didn’t stop me from beginning to actually imagine how each room would be used and arranged and salivating over the storage prospects.

And then our contract fell through; she backed out. And we were so disappointed. I asked God why? Didn’t He want me to do what I’d promised?

And this was His answer, “It’s not about the house”.

And I knew immediately that He was right. I didn’t need a new house to begin delving into life changing relationships. And though I hated to do it, I thanked Him for sending the perfect contract and then allowing it to fall through. Because before that I was so focused on the house that I had missed what He really wanted for me.

The following week I began meeting with a friend for the purpose of becoming a “basement boys” type of group. And we met in our old house. And the things that God revealed to both of us in just that first meeting were some of the most powerful lessons of God I’ve ever learned.

It really wasn’t about the house.

But that didn’t stop me from praying that God would send us a cash offer for our house that would allow us to still close on our old house on the originally scheduled date and close on the dream house the very next day.

And He did.

In just one day shy of four weeks, we got our house ready to sell, listed it, sold it, bought a new one, and moved.

Actually, what really happened is this…in one day shy of four weeks, God taught me an incredibly important lesson, blessed us beyond what we ever deserved, showed us His faithful love in an incredibly powerful and memorable way, and put me in a deep spiritual relationship with another woman that has already been life changing.

God is so good.

Appliance Survey

We are going to be buying new washer, dryer, and refrigerator this week. I'm curious if any of you have clear preferences on top loading vs. front loading? Also, what about side by side vs. freezer on top or bottom of the refrigerator? If any of you have an opinion, I'd love to hear it...even you secret readers who never leave comments.

Please continue to pray that all goes smoothly through closing. Saturday at midnight is the end of our buyer's option time. We close on our house Monday morning and the new house Tuesday morning. We seriously appreciate all of your prayers about it.

I have a whole new respect for people who have to move around frequently. It is exciting, but it is wearing me out. I'm ok if we never have to move again!

Brief Update

We have a new contract on our house. It isn't quite as good as what we had hoped, but they are paying cash. That means that we will be able to close and move on the originally scheduled dates, August 18 and 19. Praise God! And keep praying that this contract sticks!

On another note, I just have to say again how much I love Southwest c of C. Every worship I leave feeling challenged, filled, and equipped to be a disciple the rest of the week. God has been so good to us.

D.C. al fine

And Lord, haste the day when the faith shall be sight.
The clouds be rolled back as a scroll.
The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend.
Even so, it is well with my soul.


I totally thought I was done with this song, because frankly, I'm not one of those people who usually longs for the Lord to return right now. I always think about the things I'd still like to do and experience. I tend to think that it is older folks who really sing with gusto on this verse.

But tonight, I got to experience something that made me long to hear that trumpet sound and see the Lord descend. Our church had a combined service with the other big church of Christ in town. The worship ministers from both places lead us in worship that was entirely singing and reading scripture. Or course, since it was a Sunday night, it was a smaller crowd from both churches, but large enough to fill the chapel. And, as usually happens, it was a group who wanted to sing.

And sing we did. It took my breath away. I have a friend who gives me a hard time(not in a bad way) about being a member of the church of Christ, and more specifically about singing a capella. I wish she could have been there. I think she would have been blown away by not only the beautiful singing but also the moving of the Spirit in that place. It felt like a little bit of heaven.

Tomorrow is my first day back to work, and I haven't really been looking forward to it. I had a difficult year last year, and I've been somewhat apprehensive about what this year might hold. I can't think of a better way to get in the right frame of mind to go back than by the drink of Oasis I got to experience tonight.

Same Song, Different Verse

When peace, like a river, attendath my way.

When sorrows, like sea billows, roll.

Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say,

It is well. It is well, with my soul.

On our way to dinner, in honor of our eleventh wedding anniversary, we got a phone call from our realtor. She let us know that the woman with whom we had a contract on our house backed out. So, we are headed back to Whoville. The magic lines on the carpet should be in place before we leave for church tomorrow. Even so, it is still well, with my soul.

And in honor of our 11th anniversary, here are 11 things that I love about my beloved.

1. He makes me laugh every single day.
2. He gives me a great deal on computer repair. He fixes it; I give him...whatever. ;)
3. He helps me to remember that worry is a waste of energy.
4. He is very handy...oh, and he can fix stuff too.
5. He makes me laugh at myself.
6. He willingly completes my mom's honey-do list when we visit.
7. He always drives, even on long trips.
8. He taught me to shoot a gun and drive an ATV.
9. He doesn't get uncomfortable when I cry.
10. He LOVES to talk about his feelings.
11. He might call me a "Smoochmonger", but he gives me as many as I want anyway.

A Classic

I love all of the new praise and worship songs we sing. But we sang one of my "older" favorites this Wednesday and it's been on my mind every since.

My sin, oh the bliss of this glorious thought.
My sin, not in part, but the whole.
Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more.
Praise the Lord.
Praise the Lord, Oh my soul.

Knowing this truth, it is indeed well with my soul.

Wrestling Match

Ephesians 4:17-19 “So I tell you this, and insist on it in the Lord, that you must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more.”

I truly hated the sermon this Sunday morning. Brian talked to us about the agreements that we have made with Satan, lies that Satan has whispered to us that we have accepted, or as the scripture words it, ways that our understanding has been darkened that cause us to somehow be separated from the life of Christ. One of the examples he gave was about a son who broke his father’s trust. So, the father slowly came to accept the lie that he could never trust his son again and furthermore, could never really trust anyone. You can imagine how believing that lie might affect the rest of your life and keep you from the fullness of life in Christ.

That got me to thinking about the kids I work with who believe all sorts of lies like, “I’m stupid,” “No one likes me,” “I can’t do math,” or even “I’m a good friend.” But then I started thinking about the lies I sometimes believe that make it OK for me to sin. Things like “It’s not hurting anyone,” “It helps me to be a better wife/counselor/daughter/fill in the blank,” or even the ever popular “Everyone does it…even Christians”.

Can you see why I hated this sermon? For some reason, while I was listening on Sunday, God brought to mind a particular area in my life that is a struggle. I started to wonder if maybe I’d made some agreements that were darkening my understanding and causing me to lose all sensitivity. And of course, since I went and asked God to show me those agreements (what was I thinking?), he began to bring them to mind. And because I like this particular sin and am not eager to give it up, I began a bit of a wrestling match with the Lord. OK, a really big wrestling match. It was all I could think about; some of those agreements were so much a part of my normal thought process and justification process that it was really hard to get to truth…especially because part of me just really didn’t want to see it. I like the lie better. (I can be pretty stubborn sometimes.)

After much agonizing and analyzing and general stubbornness, I decided that God was probably right, and I was probably wrong…go figure. So, I talked to Him about it and worked it all out. For now. We may wrestle about it again sometime, but I’m hoping that the scars will be good enough reminders that I won’t go there again.

Unfortunately, He has been showing me some other areas of agreement that I need to work on. Probably the biggest lie of all is that because I don’t do the “big” sins…murder, stealing, etc….that I’m OK and have it all together. Talk about living in ignorance.

This whole being a disciple of Christ thing is painful sometimes, but I think I'd rather wrestle than be "separated from the life of God".