Ornery Orange

There’s a mystery afoot
In these here parts
It colored the day
With an orangish start.
I got here extra early
To start on my list
Looked down at my pants
And got super pissed.
There’s an orangish stain
Running down my leg
It looks and smells
Like some ketchup dregs.
So I’ve gotta stop
And tell you right now
I haven’t eaten any ketchup
So I don’t know how
Such a disgusting stain
Could have suddenly appeared
And through no help from me
Seems to have smeared.
Jennifer told me
It matches my shirt
And I was super nice
Didn’t tell her to eat dirt.
I’m totally grossed out
And I wanna go home
Gotta hide in my office
Cuz I sure can’t roam
Out and about
Someone might laugh
And the mood I’m in,
I might say, “kiss my a**.”
How did this happen?
This ketchup mess
Did I smash a packet?
I must confess
I have no idea
What I could have done
All I know is
It ain’t no fun.